Record number of students register for 8am classes

For decades, college students have measured the greatness of their schedule through the start time of their first class of the day. It is widely known that college students cherish sleeping in almost as much as Scooby-doo loves Scooby snacks. Recently, however, students at Bucknell University have started to demand and register for more 8am classes than ever before, causing mass panic among University administrators as they search for professors who were willing to teach at such insanely early times.

The University usually has only the necessary number of 8am classes. These classes are usually the last to get filled unless they are required classes for majors. However, this semester, students have filled up these classes before others. Students have even been requesting additional 8am classes. “It’s really amazing how much you can get done when you start your day at 8am instead of 11am,” said sophomore Jimmie Johnson from Connecticut.

Professors are not quite ready for the change that the students are demanding. “Some of us love to get up early and teach that 8am class. Others were more than happy to sleep in and teach their first class at 11am,” said a History professor who preferred not to be named. Ultimately, the University administration is in charge of the scheduling of classes for next semester, so the school stakeholders will have to wait and see what the administration decides. The University administration was unavailable for comment for this article.

Disclosure: This is a piece of satire


2 thoughts on “Record number of students register for 8am classes”

  1. Your blog post was both hilarious and thought-provoking. I really enjoyed reading the discussion and it made me wondering if professors or universities could devise incentives for students to take 8 am classes. Do you have any ideas? Food seems to be a major motivator for college students, so perhaps breakfast and class could motivate students to sign-up for 8 ams. I certainly loved when DURAK brought munchkins to my 8 am classes in the past.


  2. You could add that the University will start adding classes at 5 a.m. so that 8 becomes the new 11!

    Seriously, though, 8 a.m. is not that popular with faculty. I think 9 or 10 is most coveted.

    I would like to make all sports practices from 5-8 a.m. and have classes run from 9-6 p.m. The athletes signed up for such treatment… I don’t know why practices from 5-7 needs to crowd out teaching time.


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